Trust30, day 12; Fear

These are the voices which we hear in solitude, but they grow faint and inaudible as we enter into the world. Society everywhere is in conspiracy against the manhood of every one of its members. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Is fear holding you back from living your fullest life and being truly self expressed? Put yourself in the shoes of the you who’s already lived your dream and write out the answers to the following:

Is the insecurity you’re defending worth the dream you’ll never realize? or the love you’ll never venture? or the joy you’ll never feel?

Will the blunder matter in 10 years? Or 10 weeks? Or 10 days? Or 10 minutes?

Can you be happy being anything less than who you really are?

Now Do. The Thing. You Fear.

I love the sentiment and spirit of this question. There is zero doubt that if you absolutely know, right to the core of your soul, that you could be doing something that makes your heart sing, choosing not to pursue it will be a mighty weight that will affect every fiber of your life story... and not in a good way.

The excuses of "I don't know how," or "I can't afford the time/money" will actually assist you in seeing the core defenses that base ego will hurl against your desire. One of the most powerful is "What will they say/think?"

If that one comes up, then you know for certain that you are striking close to the nerve center of your "familiar zone." This is specifically what Emerson is addressing; you might be "kicked out of the club."

If that's the case, I think this quote by Marx is most apropos: "Please accept my resignation. I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member". (Love you, Groucho!)

Pursuing that dream is life giving, nourishing... it keeps you vibrant and alive IF you are doing for the joy of it. The "tender trap" that can be triggered if not conscious while engaged in the pursuit sounds like this; "I'll be happy when..."

When we find ourselves in that mindset, the journey can easily become a chore and not enjoyable. That is specifically when it becomes easy to say, "Screw it. I'll just stay here with everyone else. This many people can't be wrong so..." (This is the crux of the "Would I rather be right or would I rather be happy" dilemma. You point and observe, "Just like them" as they point at you and say the same thing in justification/rationalization.)

If this was easy, everyone would be doing it.

I love cliches because the kernel of truth within becomes apparent as you poke around it. "Carrying the weight of the world" doesn't happen when you stand alone in pursuit of your dream but rather, when you choose, consciously or not, to stay at the level of mass consciousness. The spark of authenticity contained within will never die and will attempt to make you aware of that weight crushing down on it... and "it" is really "you."

The true you... the authentic you... the One that you came here to express and Be.

Final thought; As you decide to embrace your dream, consider making this the first thing that you do... become comfortable with it. Line it up. The best analogy I can offer to those who ever played baseball or softball is the "new glove."

You yearned for that wonderful new glove. Begged for it. Put it on every list to Santa (or your parents/family.) And then the big day comes and it's finally a part of your life! What happens if you rush out to play with your new glove before taking a little time and patience to "break it in" the right way?

It didn't work too well as you tried to catch the ball, did it? The same applies to your dream, the thing you've been fearing to do because, "What would they say?"

Line up with it. Break it in. "Oil" it, work your way into it in joy because (really and truly,) the joy isn't just in the journey... it is the journey.

And when you've got that, you've got it all.